My mornings usually start the same way; with me sleepily stepping into the gym. I turn on my music, put one foot in front of the other on the “dreadmill,” lift weights, get cleaned up and head to work. I’ve met a few people at the gym, but chat rarely. You can count on a “good morning” or “hello” and a warm smile as I rest during reps, while the headphones blare. I may be guilty of yelling my greetings due to the volume (don’t judge me). Today, though, I plopped down on a machine, started my exercise and a friend came and sat beside me, so I pulled the headphones off. After we exchanged pleasantries, I kept the music off. I noticed something. The sounds of people breathing, the weights clanging, more huffing, sighing and grunting from those people around me. The silence and the sounds between those seemingly random noises affected me.
You typically hear people talking about cutting through all the noise and getting clarity. I think sometimes it’s more than noise. It’s music. The music is made up of the things we love, things we’re passionate about, and activities that we enjoy. It’s not noise, it’s the music of our individual life and it may just sound awful to others, so they call it noise.
I think my experience impacted me this morning because I read an interview about Tachi Yamada, M.D., president of the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation’s Global Health Program. The title was Talk to Me. I’ll Turn Off My Phone. I’m fantastically guilty of NOT doing that and I’m usually doing three things at once and leave people feeling less than special. And I’m sorry. I don’t want to be that guy anymore. Technology, connectedness and being in social situations is my music. It’s time to pause the music from time to time. I’ll fail, because I enjoy my music, and I’ll try to pause it again. I’m starting today.
Being an avid @foursquare player, I was tinkering on the website when I stumbled onto the page with a foursquare party, 16 new badges, foursquare swag and temporary tattoos. Track down the right people at the Sobe Lounge, Microsoft Bing Booth, IFC Crossroads House and SXSW Web Awards. Needless to say, I can’t wait to unlock these goodies and hopefully meet the folks from foursquare in Austin. Just a few more days, so we’ll see you in the ATX!
We live our lives based on social conventions where we want some sort of relationship, no matter how fleeting it is, before we want to help someone. I know that I’m guilty of this mentality. Do you have an internal monologue that goes something like this: “What? You want my help? You want to inconvenience me? Ugh. I don’t really know you OR you haven’t gone through the right channels to be able to ask for that.” This is typical and no one would be surprised if you thought that way when a stranger asked for a favor. Dr. Cialdini, professor at the University of Arizona even talks about the importance of reciprocity.
I want to challenge you to be better than the social convention. When someone asks you for a favor, why not decide to be the first one to extend a helping hand? Do it without any expectation of the person. Do it cheerfully and help wholeheartedly. Do it even when you don’t have a relationship with that person. Decide to be the positive influence in someone’s day. You never know, your actions could change someone’s life.
The folks at Wikipedia found it best for the site to delete the list of foursquare badges. I found it useful in helping me aim for my next badge… and @cipriani15 asked, so I had to help! Below you can find a PDF of the page as well as a link to the cached page from Wikipedia. Enjoy.
Special hat tip to Tony Felice for having built this list.
Marcus and I have been friends since the 90’s. Since Bill Clinton was President. Since Motorola introduced the StarTac. Since he chewed on my loaned pen (I didn’t take it back). Recently, I’ve been enjoying his tweets as he’s become really active on Twitter. Marcus is known as @mlnorvell4 and recently he made it his mission to get a response from Brent Spiner – @brentspiner – of Star Trek and Independence Day fame. How would he do this? Tweet insane messages. It worked. Here are the high res JPG and PDF files for your humor. Keep it up, Marcus. Next target? @JimNorton Good luck, buddy.
On Saturday, my buddy, Choco and I were driving back to San Antonio from an event we put on in Victoria for a client. As we buzzed along US 87 we spotted a guy walking with a cross. For the record, I have never stopped for a hitch hiker or a person doing something out of the ordinary on the highway. Saturday, though, was a different day. Choco and I looked at one another and decided that we should stop and have a chat with this guy to see why in the world he would choose to do such a thing. Here’s Steven Hope’s story on why he is carrying a cross.
After watching his video, you could come away with a million thoughts.
“This guy is crazy.”
“I wish I had the faith to do that.”
“Just another radical Christian”
“That’s amazing”
I simply thought “I wish I had as much passion, conviction AND action as Steven.” Most of us, simply bounce from one day to the next, guided by our social norms, bills, families and the like. Our lives turn out to be shaped much by the consequences of our circumstances, more than being shaped by a vision of what we want from our lives, our relationships and our careers.
After I turned the camera off, Steven, Choco and I discussed the amazing things that have happened to him along his 60+ city tour and how he was repeatedly delighted. Choco and I simply listened to the seemingly magical events that affected Steven. Now, I live an incredible life, surrounded by wonderful people, but I feel that I could easily take a lesson on clarity matched with action from Steven. Meeting Steven has inspired me to renew my search for even greater clarity and action. Steven’s words and actions were tied together. That’s why his message was so impactful. If nothing else, Steven’s story is a great example of how powerful it is to do what you say you’re going to do.
If you’re already acting on your passion and you know it, can you share your experience? How did you figure it out? How did you know that you were on the right track? What did it take for you to get started? Was there any confusion if you were on the correct path?
It’s funny how frequently we forget to apply the basics in our lives. We’re then reminded, smack our foreheads and think “DUH!” That’s probably why we were fascinated by “Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader” and why The Golden Rule never goes out of style. Simple things brought back to our attention create new found fascination. Well, here’s one for you. Are you interested in going far in life, getting things that you want more easily than others and having people say “yes” more frequently than they say “no”? Try this: be likable. Be likable like a happy dog that greets you with a wagging tale.
Likability can be extremely persuasive when you’re trying to accomplish your goals. Are there people that can do with out it? Absolutely! It oftentimes requires greater positional authority, though. So, for example, if you’re trying to convince someone to donate to your cause, hire you for a job, return an item after the warranty period, you need to realize that you’re selling. Former Publicis CEO, Bob Bloom writes in his upcoming book “We seldom buy from someone we do not like.” So how well are you doing selling your services, ideas and requests?
There you have it, go be likable. Are you unsure if you’re doing a good job at being likable? Smile at people all week, see what kinds of responses you get. Are you interested in really becoming likable day in and day out? Go pick up a copy of the classic “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie. Once you get it, keep it forever and read it over and over again throughout the course of your life. If you’d like it as a PDF so you can print it or read it on your Kindle, you can pick up a copy gratis (PDF Link).
Last evening I was reading some of Ed Wallace’s Business Relationships That Last where he spoke of Max the Cab Driver. Max would pick Ed up in a British taxi in immaculate shape with bottled water and an ear ready to listen to Ed’s life stories. He would remember the little details such as Ed’s newborn, so he would gently tap on the screen door to not wake the baby. After Ed’s first ride with Max, he hoped to book him for the next week. Unfortunately, Max was booked typically booked two to four weeks out. Max explained that the extra little efforts he made were the same ones that people do for their friends. This was how he turned “fares into friends.” What do you do to enhance your personal brand or your company’s offering that is a small extra to make your customers feel as if they are getting a friend’s bonus? How has it paid off for you? Share in the comments!
WARNING: Don’t let your kids read this until they’re no longer living in your house.
Rules are helpful. They put order in our lives. They reduce risk and minimize variance. “I’m sorry, I can’t give you a free room, the rules don’t allow it.” In fact, I will enact rules to suit me and you likely do the same. At trade shows and conferences, I hate carrying the terrible and bulky marketing materials that the drones distribute. To ensure that I don’t have to bother, I carry an impossibly small bag that fits a few choice items and say “I’m sorry, I’m unable to carry anything larger than what can fit in this bag.” ”Oh, of course, sir. Absolutely.” Rules can be established willy-nilly. Our society has built us to believe that if a rule exists, there must have been a far smarter person who developed the rule for a greater good. Although this may be true at times, I suggest that some many of these rules are ruining your life… well, at least your day, and that many of the people that developed many of the stupid rules ranged between myopic and mouth breathing fools.
Today is the day you can break free from these chains. Do you want three breakfast coupons during your stay, but your room doesn’t include them? Ask for them. And be specific about the exact number you want! Do you need to get an exception to a minimum seating rule because your group has no budget and can’t pay out of pocket? Ask specifically for an exception. I constantly hear, “but the rules RIGHT THERE say you CAN’T do that!” I don’t care. At the end of the day, I’m going to ask for what I want and need, then let the person receiving my request make a judgment call on whether my personalized request will be granted. But what happens if they say “no?” *GASP* You now have two choices. Option #1 - Say “thank you” and carry on. Option #2 – When a “no” is unacceptable, do what the kids do…ask dad. Or in this case, just ask someone else who has the authority to give you the answer you want and need.
It’s a new year, go ask for an exception this week and remember that it doesn’t always work. As I like to say: You win some, you win some later.
One of my favorite applications to share with people is Wikitude. Wikitude is considered an “augmented reality” application. Basically, with Wikitude, it uses the compass, gps and camera on an Android phone or iPhone to give you details about what you’re looking at and what is surrounding you. Say you’re looking at the Alamo with Wikitude. A small bubble pops up telling you that you’re looking at the Alamo and if you click on the bubble, it opens the Wikipedia page for the Alamo. It’s an extremely fun and handy application, especially when you’re traveling.
The next step is using an augmented reality application tied with facial recognition. Right now, face.com’s Photo Finder for Facebook is providing astonishingly accurate results. You can sign up for an invitation (you know you want it) for free.
Soon, the applications, the phones and the mobile speeds will be sufficient for you to be walking through a crowd and be able to identify who a person is via their social networks. In fact, a company called TAT is working on application called augmented ID. augmented ID will allow a person to connect their social networks to their ID, then share them depending on the time of day.
What do you think about the convergence of these technologies? Will it continue pushing the the end of our false sense of privacy? Will it make meeting people more fun? Weigh in, the comments section await.
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